Confidence Building Steps That Work Like Crazy!

By Annette Colby

Self-confidence is your assessment of your own self-worth. It plays a large part in determining your happiness through life. So how do you create confidence? Well here's a surprise - you take action! If you don’t currently have much self-confidence, let’s explore the options on how to cultivate this trait within your life.

NFL legend Roger Stauback (Cowboys Quarterback 1969-1979) said, "Confidence doesn't come out of nowhere. It's a result of something...hours and days and weeks and years of constant work and dedication." No, you don’t have to dedicate your life to professional sports or be a super hero to have confidence. It’s much easier than that. It just takes a decision that you find yourself worthy of deciding on which general direction you want to head towards in life (i.e. an overall goal), then following through with the steps it takes to have what you want. Goal setting is an important method of:

Deciding what is important to you to achieve in your life

Separating what is important for you from what is irrelevant

Allowing yourself to feel good by motivating yourself to achievement

Building your self-confidence based on measured achievement of goals

Your level of confidence is not fixed (meaning it can’t be changed) nor will it magically appear at the end of your goal. Being true to yourself means knowing exactly what you want and coming up with a strategy, a plan of how to achieve it. But more than that, it means deciding to have fun while you are in the process of creating something new for yourself. Confidence comes from deciding which specific actions you will take today, following through on those actions, and then recognizing to yourself that you followed through. This means taking a little time at the end of the day to sit with yourself and feel good about your efforts. Nobel Peace Prize winner Albert Schweitzer suggests, "Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful."

No one is forcing you to do something that is difficult (i.e. achieve the goal you’ve set for yourself). You alone decided you wanted to have something you didn’t currently have. You alone decided you wanted to expand your life experience. Your goals are the vehicle through which you allow yourself to have what you want and feel really good in the process. Goals are a solo act. And you alone are the allower or disallower of what you want.

Every time you make a decision during the day, ask yourself this question, "Does this choice take me closer to, or further from my goal." If the answer is "closer to," then you've made a decision to allow yourself to be successful. Notice how that feels in your body. If the answer is "further from," notice how that feels. Decide what choice you can make to feel better, more alive, more expanded.

If you didn’t make the daily choice to support yourself in having your goal, decide if you wish to develop a new potential solution to having what you want or re-evaluate what you want. If your goals no longer hold any attraction for you, then let them go. Goal setting should bring you pleasure, satisfaction and a sense of achievement.

Every time you allow yourself to take a step in the direction of what you want also take the time to celebrate and feel as good in your body as you possibly can. Otherwise, what’s the point? Life is about how good you can allow yourself to feel from the inside out, and setting a goal is the process you go through to feel better and better inside your body as you recognize the power of your own self.

Lasting self-confidence comes when you eventually realize that you have the ability to get from where you are to wherever you want to go. You are the designer of your life. You alone hold the key to your success. Lasting self-confidence comes as you no longer choose fear and self-criticism as methods for motivation. Instead you come to realize it is your job to focus on what you want and create a fertile area for your desire to grow on.

Dr. Annette Colby, RD
Nutrition Therapist & Master Energy Healer
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"Opening Creative Portals to Success"

The Power Of A Dream - Success Always Start Off With A Dream

By Justin Koh

Back in the good old days of school, the teachers would often catch us for daydreaming in class and not paying attention. "Stop dreaming! Dreaming will get you nowhere," yelled the teacher. Is it really so? Does 'dreaming' really get you nowhere in life? The answer is 'Yes'...and 'No'. If you dream and you took massive action to achieve your dream, your dream could very well come true for you. However, if you dream and take no action, it remains just a powerless dream.

Every success in this world always starts off with a dream. A dream to earning passive income from Internet Marketing, a dream to Joint-Venture with well-known gurus and a dream to earn $10,000 a day from a web business. In short, in order to accomplish great things, you need to have a dream. A dream will give you the vision, the drive and the energy to channel all your available resources into it, propelling you to soar greater heights towards the fulfilment of your goals.

As the saying goes, "If you can see it, you can have it." If you were able to 'see' your dream in your mind, you would be able to work towards it. However, if you are not able to 'see' the dream at all, there is absolutely no dream for you to reach out to. When that happens, you will always remain at where you are and there will not be any significant breakthrough in your life. Not only must you be able to 'see' your dream, you must also see it with clarity. The image that you 'see' in your dream cannot be vague; it must be as clear as crystal so that you know exactly what you want and where you are heading to. Plus, you must be able to see yourself in that place, in that time, attaining or doing that thing which you so desire. The power of a dream will then be fully realized when you have given 'legs' to your dream.

As you reach out for your dream, I promise you that as you take massive action towards it, there will be obstacles to meet you along your journey. However, the power of a dream cannot be underestimated. By having an iron will to hold on to your dream, you will always find a way to conquer all obstacles that come in your way.

Start dreaming today! And remember, Dreams Do Come True.

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Justin Koh & Nelson Tan are the architects behind Internet Mastery Center (http://www.internetmasterycenter.com) and Fresh Resources (http://www.freshresources.com).

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Motivational Posters - A Source Of Inspiration?

By Willie Jones

What Inspires You? What motivates you to get up in the morning? Are you one of those people who have a burning desire to achieve something or are you drifting along doing your daily routine? This is something you may not have put much attention on or even any at all but, if you look closely, you may find that there may have been one or more people who have inspired you in your life.

Any person who has been successful at something will tell you something like, my grandma always said…or my dad always gave me the best advice, or someone once said to me…! Get the picture?

Words can be very powerful in influencing our lives. A certain phrase can suddenly just hit you and BAM; a sudden realization can change the direction you’re going in! The reaction one has to these realizations varies tremendously.

You may find that a certain saying moves you while Joe next store doesn’t feel moved by it at all.

There are many areas of life that we look for inspiration or motivation; love and relationships, business, sales, and even in times of trouble such as war and natural disasters.

If you were in the military, you might find something like this quote, as seen on a motivational print, to be something that inspires you; “Bravery-Soldier…It takes an extraordinary person to face danger and maintain composure”.

A mother may find this inspirational, “Direction-Family…There are two important things we can give our children. One of them is roots, and the other is wings”

Another is “Leadership-Fisherman…A leader is one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way”.

These are all quotes that are often seen on motivational prints in offices and homes, but individuals we know or meet in our daily lives can also inspire us.

The visual of the poster or print along with an inspirational saying underneath can be a great tool to inspire your self and others and serve as a reminder of the path you are on.

Remember though that an inspiration or motivation from others is only as good as what we ourselves contribute to it. The real motivation comes from within.

Hang them up at work or at home and enjoy!

Willie Jones

Willie Jones is a freelance writer, researcher, floral designer, and artist. “When Art Inspires, Dreams Become Reality”. http://www.artinspires.com “Make sure you enroll in the free motivational poster drawing. All winners receive a free framed print.”

Life Inspiration: 12 Tips for Successful Living

By Jeff Herring

1. Constant affirmation without accountability is a sure-fire way to cripple a child. In other words, belief in yourself without responsibility leads to a sense of entitlement.

2. Raise your hand if you've ever been rejected for anything, anytime, anywhere. We all have. How would you like to have a nice little four-letter word for the next time you're rejected? It's: NEXT. Next sale, next job, next date, next whatever.

3. Beware of people who use their own emotional pain as a tool to manipulate others instead of as a motivation to change themselves.

4. Parents of teens need to watch out for NMK Syndrome: Not My Kid, as in "my kid couldn't have done ___" (fill in the blank). Well, yes, they could have. Even if you have faithfully raised them not to do certain things, kids still have the power of choice, which means they can make bad choices.

NMK Syndrome can blind you to something that needs immediate attention. Trust in your kids and in your parenting, and always check out what you hear.

5. When you receive a notice in your credit card statement that says, "Congratulations, because of your excellent payment history, there is no minimum fee due this month," it's not a time for celebration. You're still being charged interest. These people are not your friends.

6. It's a humbling and sobering experience to have a child who wants to be like you.

7. I've noticed more and more people doing what I call "caboose living."

Picture a three-car train. The engine in front we'll call facts/reality; the car in the middle is our thoughts, beliefs, decisions, choices and behaviors based on the facts; the caboose is our feelings. The facts/reality come first, then thoughts and behaviors followed by feelings.

Many folks try to run their life train with the caboose (feelings) in the lead. Feelings are interesting and important, but they cannot drive the train. Pay attention to your feelings, but let the facts/reality drive the train.

8. A successful marriage requires selective and strategic ignoring. The right things to ignore are little habits and irritating peculiarities that we all have. The problem comes when you select the wrong things to ignore.

9. I wonder if it's a bad thing to believe that football on TV is one of the first signs of fall approaching.

10. Most folks live with the illusion that worrying about something can actually make a difference. The only possible way that worrying can make a difference is if the worrying motivates you to take action to do something about the subject of your worry.

11.People often say, "Well, I'm just going with the flow." The problem with going with the flow is that many times the flow is lost and does not know where it is going.

12. Best quote I've seen since last time, by Miami Herald columnist Leonard Pitts: "At some point, though, a problem ought to be defined less by our ability to explain why it happens than by our willingness to demand that it happen no more."

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.

20 Ways To Improve Your Life

By Saleem Rana

People often ask me how they can improve their lives.

I always give them very specific advice on simple things they can do to create a radical shift in their experience of life.

Here are 20 ways to improve your life. I challenge you to act on each one. Adopt one a day. You will be done with the list in 20 days, but in 3 months time, your life will have changed beyond recognition!

1. Make a definite plan for success. Fix a time limit to this plan. Determine the benefits of your goal.

2. Hold on to a positive attitude. See the best in any situation. Positive thinking heals your body and vitalizes your mind. A negative outlook is self-destructive.

3. Give your employer your best service. Even if you’re underpaid, you’ll create a twofold bonus. First, you’ll increase your level of skill, and this can taranslate to a higher income later on. Second, you’ll win sufficient goodwill to attact the favor of your boss or a competitor. The more you give, the more you receive.

4. Continue to learn more about your job. Knowledge is power, and power creates increased income.

5. Work on being calm and even-tempered. An angry or bitter person is hard to get along with. Along with your positive mental attitude comes positive emotions. This enhances both your relationships and your health.

6. Share your goals with others. It is easier to achieve something when you’re working on it with someone else. If your goal is too individualistic to share with others, at least get some moral support, some people to cheer you on your way.

7. Put your faith in a higher power. Such faith removes many fears, like fear of poverty, criticism, ill health, loss of liberty, old age, and death.

8. Avoid bad habits, especially those offensive to other people. For example, criticizing others, gossiping, slandering. Also avoid taking in toxic material, like alcohol and cigarettes. Why would you want to ruin your liver and lungs?

9. Plan your work and complete each day’s work. Include in your plan, ways to work more effieciently. Don’t leave for tomorrow what can be done today. Tomorrow will have its own demands. Progress means moving forward.

10. Enjoy your work. If you don’t feel enthused, it’s time for a change.

11. Concentrate on your work. And stay at the same task until you finish it. Being easily influenced by other options and abandoning your plans when things go awry can be discouraging, and creates a sense of frustration and failure. .

12. Work in harmony with others. Help people when they ask for it. Avoid arguing, gossiping, judging. Each of us is doing our best to survive as we know how.

13. Learn from your defeats. Use your mistakes to learn what not to do. Convert your liabilities into assets. Consistently learning from errors and improving, enduring the learning curve, is necessary for success. Remember, temporary failure is only feedback. Creative work requires patience and committment. It takes time to be great.

14. Imagination is a two-edged sword. On one hand, you can create thoughts that expand your personal vision and empower you. On the other hand, you can create visions of doom that limit and frighten you. Choose to imagine your best possible outcomes. Be open to your many possibilities.

15. Allocate a fixed percentage of your income to savings. A part of all you earn should be yours to keep. Its a source of great comfort to have extra cash. Life is full of surprises. Things are going to break down unexpectedly. Opportunities are going to arise out of nowhere. Be prepared.

16. Contribute. Allocate some of what you earn to help others. The money may come back multiplied or it may give a deep sense of satisfaction.

17. Observe sound principles of health. You are not just a mind, but a body, too. Your body needs exercise, healthy food, deep relaxation, a sense of pleasure, and sufficient sleep.

18. Seek sound advice when you’re confused. Refer to people, books, and the internet, or other sources of information to get a wide spectrum of ideas and then decide for yourself what will best resolve your question.

19. Live with integrity. Create a reputation of reliability. When people can trust you, you open up a whole new world of opportunities. Your handshake should be as good as a written contract.

20. Listen to your dreams. Those you have at night, and those which whisper in your heart during the day. They may reveal to you a path of great joy.

As you read through this list, all the information will sound familiar. However, act on this information and you will shift your life to a whole new level of quality.

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Saleem Rana got his Masters degree in psychotherapy from California Lutheran University. His articles on the internet have inspired over ten thousand people from around the world. Discover how to create a remarkable life

Copyright 2004 Saleem Rana. Please feel free to pass this
article on to your friends, or use it in your ezine or
newsletter. It's a shareware article.

Self Esteem - What It Really Is and How to Raise It

By Jeff Herring

Self esteem.

Now there's a well used and little understood term. Self esteem seems to be one of those terms that we frequently use without really knowing exactly what it means. Just what is this self esteem thing? And where do you go to get some? I've never seen a self esteem store at the mall. Not yet any way.

Many people tend to define self esteem as the way you feel about yourself, which seems to be a little redundant. For the sake of this column, let's define self esteem as the perceptions and beliefs you have about yourself.

Having said all that, let's focus in on a quick and simple way to improve your self esteem.

One of the quickest and simplest methods for improving your self esteem is simply to rate it on what I call the Self Esteem Rating Scale(TM).

Here's how it works: on a scale of one to ten, with one being the worst and ten being the best, rate your self esteem in these four ways?:

1) what it is now
2) the worst it's ever been
3) the best it's ever been
4) how you would like it to be

Now, having done that (if you haven't done that, go back and do it before you read on, it just takes a few seconds!) consider these things:

What were you doing when it was the worst that you might need to eliminate?

What were you doing when it was the best that you might need to resume doing, continue doing, or do more of in the future?

If your self esteem now is higher than the worst it's ever been, what did you do to change it that you might want to continue to do?

Now take a look at the difference between what your self esteem is now and what you would like it to be. The difference is the ground you need to cover to improve your self esteem. Now for a seemingly bizarre and unrelated question. How do you like your pizza? Just bare with me here. However you like it, what would happen if you tried to eat an extra large version of it in one bite? That's right, you couldn't do it and would probably choke. So you slice it into smaller pieces and then take even smaller bites to accomplish the task.

It's the same way with self esteem. For example, let's say your self esteem is now a five and you would like it to be a ten. That's a difference of five self esteem levels. If you tried to jump from a five to a ten all at once, you would probably become frustrated, discouraged and give up. It's just to big a leap.

What you can do is begin to break it into manageable pieces by asking yourself "What will it take to move from a five to a six, a six to a seven?" , and so on. In this way you are biting off manageable chunks that will give you the opportunity to achieve small successes, which can then motivate you on to the bigger successes of accomplishing your self esteem goal.

While using the Self Esteem Rating Scale can be a quick and easy way to improve your self esteem, that's not to say it won't involve some struggles. And that's a good thing because I believe there is value in the struggle. A patient of mine recently shared the following wonderful story about butterflies and the value of struggling.

Now if you have ever had the privilege of watching the amazing process of a butterfly leaving its cocoon, you know its quite a struggle. Well, it seems some scientists, in their esteemed wisdom, found a way to get butterflies out of their cocoons without a struggle. What they found however, was that the butterflies that had to struggle out of their cocoons lived longer, flew better, and were more beautiful than the butterflies that were removed without a struggle.

Besides saying something about the value of the struggle, I believe it also says something to us about the difference between science and success!

Maybe it's like something Tom Hanks said in the movie "A League of Their Own." One of the players was complaining about how hard something was and Hanks responded, "Of course it's hard. That's what makes it good." Or perhaps it's like I say to many of my patients who want to change their self esteem, "I won't promise you the struggle will be easy, just worth it."

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.